don't shed those tears

Why do I suddenly feel so sad? Is it because I'm talking to Han about her love life problems and so its making me think about my problems? Or is it because I miss you? I feel like crawling into a hole and staying there right now. I feel like crying until I can cry no more.

I just want to get drunk. I want to smoke. You know what I'm on about tasex.

Maybe I'm feeling depressed because I've got so many locked up emotions inside of me. You may look at me and think I'm normal. I have issues. A lot of them. I want to get drunk and have a d&m. I just want to talk to someone. Someone who will listen to me ramble on, watch me cry, but wont judge me. Someone who will just listen and lend me their shoulder.

Can you do that for me?

anger

Thanks for leaving me behind while you go Richmond. I know that place is bad. I only wanted to go because of you.

lazy

Missed my Usana focus group today. Ughs. What is happening to me? Less than a week to go & I'm slacking off. Pick up the slack beckies. You can do this. Platinum is so close..

Hrms..going richmond again today. I think my circle of friends is expanding. Just like you tasex, Johnny and Hieppo are becoming regular faces for me.

Chi beckies wants a bubble cup today. She better get it before she spends hours in Richmond.

stars

Thank you tasex for giving em th HTML for the stars!

---

But you..UGHS. Why do you have to fustrate me for?

---

Yeah i know. I can be hard to be with. Deal with it.

♥

i miss you..do you miss me?

waiting

Horrible day at work today. I've been away sick for 3 days, come into the office only to be handed crap on a silver platter. Thanks for asking how I am. Thanks for not treating me like a 5 year old. If you want something done, please ask, don't talk down on me. It will only make me want to quit my job.

Ughs, sometimes people can be so inconsiderate.

Went out for coffee with Han, Jequila & Lizzie at Seared. I didn't want to go but in the end I caved in. Ended up getting free drinks because Jequila & Lizzie's guy friends paid for us :D

Speaking of 'cave', thank you for protecting me when someone tried to walk back into my life ^_^

Now I'm at home waiting for... :p

Squirtle has school tomorrow morning! Whoo, hopefully this time he'll be good. Last time he was so naughty..wouldn't even pay attention to me! >=/

Ok, back to facebook stalking. Such a boring friday night *sighs*

xox
beckies

smile for me

Yesterday I saw something that freaked me out so much my legs started shaking and my heart was thumping to the point someone on the other side of the world could have heard. Thank god tasex was there, if not, I think I would have fainted on the spot.

Last night, something happened that is making me smile like this :D x 10000000000

I think tasex knows what I'm on about lOL! chi beckies hahas

Woke up this morning feeling dizzy & nauseous. My stomach still feels retarded. Third day off work now. I hope I don't get fired =/ . My headache is making it so hard to post this blog. Dammit. I want to be NORMAL. I want to be HEALTHY. I haven't been taking my Usana vitamins every day like I should. The vitamins promote cell health. Even though you think you're healthy, you should still take vitamins (preferbly Usana one's because independant studies have shown they are the best of the best & are the best in Australia) to promote OPTIMAL health.

Tasex, I can't wait to talk to you later. Something really funny was said to me last night. I need to repeat it to you before I explode!

Ok, off to bed now. I'm determined to go work tomorrow. As much as I had trading hours for money, I'm not rich enough to retire yet lOL!

xox
beckies

please dont chuck

I feel so shiettttt. I really don't want to take tomorrow off but my stomach feels like it's eating itself up and is about to be crushed with a boulder. My head is so heavy and everything is spinning.

I know, I should get off the computer, but staying in bed all day makes me super dizzy when I get up. Ughs. I hate you stomach. You're ruining my life. I want to go to work tomorrow.

tasex, thanks for listening to my silly talk haha. Remember to keep your lips sealed.

Uh-oh. Stomach is picking on me again. Have to go lie down.

Night
xox
beckies

i hate you

Ughs. Stomach, why do you give me such grief? Last time you gave me an ulcer. Then you did funny things with my liver and sent me to the hospital. Please don't do anything drastic now, I can't afford any more time off work. Taking today off is too much already.


Didn't sleep at ALL last night. I kept looking at the time and could not believe that I was still awake. Tasex, if you read this, please message me. I have something important to tell you but I don' wnt to say it here..


Last night Viet, Luc and Luc's sister came over to get bleach & peroxide off me. Luc taught squritle some new tricks! I love my little man, watching him grow and learn warms my heart up.

babyface at amber lounge saturday nights:

tracey.beckies

happy birthday babe

tasex.andy.beckies

steph.beckies

lOL! benson.beckies

tasex.hulk.beckies.dee

love u girls

decisions, decisions..

Sometimes you decide to do something and you wonder if its the right thing or not. You do what feels right..but is it right if your heart is hurting?

Our natural instinct in life is to protect ourself. But what happens when you wonder if what you're doing to protect yourself is the right thing or not?

I can be such a bitch sometimes.

babyface ~!!

tonight im going out with tasex & dee to babyface for my friend squidgys birthday.

party party party ~!

lets hope i dont get too drunk tnite =/

goodluck danny!

Goodluck Danny!!

Danny had surgery today for his arm. Hope he's doing ok..

Anyways, was so veryyyy sick today. Last night I had the WORST stomach pains, didnt even want to hug my man to sleep :(

At work today, I wanted to crawl under my desk and die. Every step made me dizzy, food made me chuck. So horrible.

Ended up leaving work an hour and a half early. I couldn't hack it anymore.

My man is bringing me preserved egg & salted pork congee now. Good stuff Kizza =]

Had a talk with Dalin today, I want to upgrade from 1BC to 3 BC (confused much readers? :p) so he said he will show me on Sunday at focus group. Whoooo, 2 more weeks left to try & achieve Platinum Pacesetter. Wish me luck guys!

If anyone is wondering, Platinum Pacesetter is one of the commission bonuses that you can get with Usana, you only have 6 weeks from the date you start your business to be eligible for it, but it pays you for life =] . I don't like explaining too much about Usana on my blog, remember..anyone interested just has to let me know.

Going to sleep off my sickness now!

xox

beckies

my love

this is my baby, he never lets me down. even when he bites me

squirtle ♥

7 months & 2 days old

one small event can change everything

Wow.

Yesterday i was with Danny, Benson & Andy spilling my guts out (to Andy mainly). It's nice talking to guys. Different to talking to your girlfriends and definitely different to your boyfriend.

They didn't care whether or not I wanted to continue with my Usana business, he just wanted to help me with my whole confidence/fear/bloody life ruining issues (lol). They were happy just talking to me. I'm glad to have bro's like that =D

Anyways..the reason I'm over the moon today is..I've gotten my 2nd person to start a business with Usana! Oh My Gosh I just want to jump for joy! The first person I got to start their own business was my cousin Peter, and now I've gotten one of my very very close girlfriends Ta to join!

This is absolutely fantastic because now we're on our way to financial freedom and not only that, I get to work with the people I love. It's great because we're going on this journey together, what we do will affect each other, but if we want to be independant and do this on our own (or stop), we still can!

It's funny how one small event can change your whole outlook on life. Just a couple of days ago, I wanted to crawl into a hole and hide forever. Today I feel like I can conquer the world.

Bring it on world. My friends are here to support me the whole way. You might knock me down but I know they'll help me get back up.

imagining things

I had a talk with Andy before. I've compeltely been imagining the whole being judged thing. Which I think could be true.

I spent today reflecting about what's been going on in my entire life. I've found that, because of everything I've been through, I don't have a lot of self-confidence. I know I can act confidence, but all I'm doing is acting. I never want to ask for the best things because I feel like I don't deserve it. I work my ass off for the things I want and when I do get it, I still feel like I don't deserve it.

I honestly feel like I don't deserve good things. Not because I'm a bad person, but because of how I've been made to feel growing up. All my life experiences that have taught me this. Yeah I know, you're probably going to tell me everyone deserves good things. Tell that to my brain. Whenever something good happens or is happening to me, I feel like running.

Everyone that I've met through Usana and work with are lovely people. They are so encouraging and supportive. Yesterday I had to do a talk in front of the group (there were only a few of us) and I was sooooo nervous. After my speech, all I saw were smiles, noone cared that I forgot half the things I wanted to say (they didn't know lOL), all they cared about was that I got up to speak. That's what is so great about Usana, there's so much support to develop yourself as a person. I think because it is so great and that I'm surrounded by such an amazing bunch of people that I feel unworthy and judged.

im a quitter i guess

As much as I enjoy doing Usana, it seems like the time has come for me to quit.

My whole life I've always felt like I'm being judged. From when I was little, people would judge my family, to now, people would judge me. It's horrible. I hate it. I want to crawl in a hole and get away from it all.

It might just be my imagination, but in Usana, I still feel judged. Yesterday we had focus group and then lunar new years celebrations. It was so much fun! I started drinking at 12pm -.-" . After that, I went with my Usana bro's (lol) to Box Hill and we continued drinking there.

It was in Box Hill that I started to feel like shit. I don't kow if it was because I had been drinking and was being loud, but once again I felt those judging eyes on me. Coming from my Usana family, it made me feel so low. I may have been feeling it because one of them knows one of my deepest and darkest secrets and every fear I had just came out. It could also be because another called me annoying. Ouch.

Either way, whatever the reason. I left box hill to meet my good good friend Ta (we call her tasex LOLs!) & her boyfriend Luuey. We went basslounge (a club in the city) for a night out. I drank more there. Ughs. I ended up getting picked up by a dude that was celebrating his 25th birthday. He tried to kiss me, I walked away. Then he went up to tasex & said he'll be able to get me home BECAUSE IM EASY. I'll show you easy. He was given he cold shoulder after that. I don't like getting picked up when I go clubbing so when he said that I wanted to knee him in the balls. Jerkface.

Also got picked up by another girlfriend's (JenJen) friend. A dude called Andy? Too short sorry. He did by me a rose however. I think I gave it to Luuey's mates LOL!

I also made a friend, a random girl Rianna asked to dance with us because she was there with guys only. I got her number. I'll definitely be giving her a call next time I go out, she was fun & even protected me from random jerks that wanted to dirty dance with me!

So a drunken Lunar New Year, with me STILL being hunover at 2.30pm..and what happens today reflects the rest of the year. What a fun year this will be =]

Such a shame that I don't have the guts or confidence to continue Usana. Looks like my journey to financial freedom is going to be put on hold. Instead of retiring at the age of 30, I'll be retiring at the age of 40. Goodnight world, I'm going back to sleeping my hangover off.

xox
beckies nguyen

mystikaleyez

Recently (just before Usana), I started a contact lens business with my friend.

We import Korean contact lens straight from the manufacturer and sell it via our online shop.

www.mystikaleyez.com

Come check it out!

It all started off with me wanting to buy the contacts after seeing my business partner wearing them..and one thing led to another and now i have A LOT of contacts. I even have contacts with stars and butterflies in them!











visit www.mystikaleyez.com people! help a voguette out =D

quitting seems so easy

Everytime we're faced with something difficult, we take the easy route. Rarely do we push ourselves to do what we want to do.

When I think of the challenges I face with this business, it scares the hell out of me.

Last night I was at my best friends house. They know me inside out, just like I know them inside out. When I told them about what I was doing, they questioned me. 'Do you really think you're going to get anywhere with this business?' When you're best friends question you like that, it kinda makes you doubt yourself. A lot.

I feel like, with everything I've been through, I have to work really hard to prove myself. It's like, no matter what you do, you're never good enough.

One bad experience can change your entire life. We let our fears govern our thoughts, actions etc.

Why do we always limit ourselves with our fears? If we face our fears, then really..there are no limits.

Sydney!

A couple of posts ago, I mentioned how I went to Sydney for the Annual Usana Celebration. I've only got a handful of photos from that WONDERFUL weekend trip.

bus full of crazy asians hahas


can u spot me?


Jessica & Dalin - a power couple :D


Jamie & Danny


Dalin & Andy


Anita & I (look how brassy my hair is >__<)


USANA !!


Can you see meeeeee


Group Shots





After a tour of the Usana building, its only natural for us to go eat some delicious sichuan food!







Jessica, jamie & Danny


Chanmala, meeee, Anita. wow, look at all my regrowth! eek!


There were heaps more photos but I don't have them all hahas. All I can say is, being at the Sydney Celebration..it made Usana so much more real for me. It made the message of health more powerful.

One of the biggest things I took home was that, in this business, you're not only trying to make yourself rich, but you're also making the people around you rich. Power in numbers. I don't succeed unless you succeed. It's all about teamwork. When approaching someone about Usana, its all about..how can I help change their lives? How will they benefit from this? When you think in this un-selfish way, its actually pretty cool :D

angry at the world

It seems like whenever i do something, someone is there to knock me back.

Why can't people be happy that im doing something with myself? Fair enough that u don't believe in what I'm doing, but can't you just smile and nod instead of opening your mouth and making me feel stupid for trying to achieve my dreams?

I think everyone deserves a fair go..you might not believe in what I'm doin but let me have my chance to prove you wrong.

Scared and excited

Now that I've decided to grab onto this opportunity, I realised there was so much I needed to do!

From learning about the products to the business, I felt like my head was going to explode. I met up with Andy and Danny several times to discuss what I needed to do to grow my business. Each time, it didn't seem real. It didn't seem like I had taken the first of many steps to financial freedom.

So on Sunday the 24th, I went to Dalin's house. Dalin has been in the business for about 5 years now. Dalin and his wife Jessica, have been kind enough to help, guidance and training to people like myself who have just started.

When I showed up, I was shocked by the amount of people there, I was expecting 3-4 people, but it was probably close to 10 or even more! It was exciting to know what these people were also starting out just like me. It made me less worried about not being able to do this.

While at Dalin's, they talked about a Usana having a 'Celebration' in Sydney. After calculating roughly how much it would cost; i thought, what the hell! Before I knew it, I had flights, accomodation and my ticket to the Celebration booked.

Now..just to let you know, I'm not made of money. I don't have money just waiting to be spent. I had to budget hardcore for this. The reason why I was willing to fork out the money last minute, was because I knew that what I would see and learn in Sydney would do wonders for my business. Sometimes it takes just a small investment to change our lives.

Omgsh, can I just tell you. I was (and still am) PETRIFIED. All my life, I was never a leader. I just went with the flow. In school, when I had to stand at the front of the classroom and speak, my mouth would go dry, my face went red & my hands went sweaty. Here I was, someone who spent my whole life following others, walking in someone's shadow, about to go out there in the big scary world and make something of myself.

I still get butterflies in my tummy thinkng about what lies ahead.

My journey begins

On January 16th 2010, my friend Andy sent me a message on Facebook. In that message, he offered me a business opportunity. As I have always wanted to be financially free, I agreed to find out more.

On Monday the 18th of January, I went to a seminar that changed my life.

Before I go any further, let me take you back to the beginning.

Back in 2006-2007, I started reading books about gaining financial freedom and property investments. Coming from a family that had always struggled with money, I desperately wanted to make something out of myself. Even though I already had a full time job at the time, I knew it wasn't enough.

The book that started me on my journey was called Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. In this book, he talks about how we are all working to make someone else rich, how we need to stop being Employees and be Business Owners instead if we want to get out of the Rat Race.

The Rat Race is basically what most of us are stuck in. It means that you are going around in circles. In the rat race you live a life of financial insecurity. Your income is just enough to provide for your daily needs and/or those of your family. You get your paycheck and a week after you wait for another paycheck. It is because your income was already spent on your loans, wants and necessities. You live life paycheck to paycheck.

At the time of reading a few of Robert Kiyosaki's books, I so badly wanted to change my life. But being only 17 at the time and surrounded by friends that only wanted to party (I have to admit, I did too), I soon forgot about Robert Kiyosaki's advice.

Over the next two years, I would occasionaly buy a book about creating wealth. But like most people, I shyed away from the idea of doing something out of my comfort zone.

In mid 2009, I bought a house with the help of my mother! Being only 19, I could not believe my luck. I could feel financial freedom coming my way! Before you knew it, I was paying a mortgage and my life suddenly changed. I went out less, I didn't buy everything I wanted. I hated it.

So when Andy approached me last month, I was so excited at the opportunity I wanted to scream for joy! As Robert Kiyosaki mentioned in his book, when faced with an opportunity, you have the choice of whether or not you want to grab it and change your life. So many times we ignore the opportunity. This time however, I decided to give it a go.

At the seminar, I learned about the new business venture. I learned about a company that markets nutritional supplements, meal replacements and skin care. What makes this comapny so special? What sets them apart from everyone else on the market?

Well, Usana is a 5-star Rated Top Ranking Supplement in Australia and New Zealand (according to the Comparative Guide to Nutritional Supplements - MacWilliam, L. 2009, Consumer Ed.). That basically makes them the best of the best in Australia!

Their meal replacements are Low Glycemic Index (Low GI) which is great for diabetics.

What really got me interested was their skin care range Sensé. Unlike a lot of skin care products, the Sensé range is suitable for all skin types and is chemical free, with 100% natural ingredients and no preservatives!

I have been using Sensé for a week now and so far I'm loving it.

After the seminar, I met up with Andy and his friend Danny - who is also in the business - a couple more times to find out more.

On the 2nd visit, I decided to give the opportunity a go. I was ready. I had decided I wanted to be financially free, free to do what I want when I want. I was sick and tired of working a typical 9-5 job. Usana is going to help me live my dreams.

The first of many..

Hi All!

This is my first official post! :D

I decided to start a blog because I've recently started my own business and would like to keep an online diary to capture what goes on.

As I grow with this business, achieve my goals and make mistakes, I want to share my journey with you. Please feel free to offer my advise or even enquire about joining the business!

I hope you enjoy reading my blog as much as I'll enjoy writing it!